Dear Mr. VP,
Tonight, you should be proud. Tonight, I was patriotic AF.
Tonight, we played Twilight Struggle. If you think Risk is too uncomplicated and you desperately love twentieth century history, this is your jam. One player is the U.S.; one is the Soviet Union. Using a set of ridiculously complicated rules that will take approximately seventeen gameplays to memorize half of, you struggle to control the globe while also winning the space race, avoiding nuclear war, and not displaying such abject ruthlessness that your boyfriend leaves you immediately, fearing for his life.
Naturally I was the U.S. because I’m a winner.
Yes, I spread my influence all over the damn globe, thwarting communism in every corner. I left no stone unturned in my hunt for Reds.
And in the end, we won. USA! USA!
I didn’t let you down. (Though….I suppose if we’re adding a modern twist on this, you and I aren’t on the same side in a battle with the Russians.)